Thursday, 27 December 2012

[JOKE] See Santa on Christmas Day!

I overheard the dialogue below between Santa and Segun on Christmas day somewhere in the suburbs of Lagos:

Santa: Good Morning son. Merry Christmas.

Segun: Santa Baba. Double twaile. Wetin dey happen? Wetin you bring come?

Santa: Let me have your wish list

Segun: Yes ooooo. Baba Claus, you too much. (And Segun gave him his list):

I want double promotion in my Bank.

I want Arsenal to win the premiership for the next 20 years I also want Arsenal to buy Messi, Ronaldo, Iniesta, Gareth Bale, Bastian Schweinstiegger, Wes Sneijder, Gonzalo Higuain, Steven Gerrard, Yaya Toure, Iker Casillas and Fernando Torres.

I want NEPA to give us light for the next 100 years without a single outage.

I want Buhari to be President

I want our road network to be like America's.

I want to marry J.L0 and Angelina Jolie on the same day.

I want Zimbabweans to stop packing money in a wheel barrow just to buy bread.

Where the hell is Boko Haram, Santa? Since fa? Haba!!!!!

Who killed Dele Giwa?

I want a Ferrari and $1million (not Zimbabwean dollars o)

I want Lekki road toll to be N10.

Lastly I want Nigeria to be like the U.A.E

At this point, Santa couldn't take it anymore so he shredded the list in anger and pointed a red gloved finger at Segun yelling:

"You this foolish boy, I am Father Christmas, not Fadeyi Oloro or Prof Peller. Ode buruku, apa omo, omo alainironu, (by the way Santa is from Finland so I was confused by his crisp Yoruba) omo amunibinu."

"I should have known flying to Nigeria was a waste of time".

So Santa stormed out in anger and by the time he got out, Oshodi boys had stolen his Reindeer for asun and his sleigh was badly damaged by the bumpy Oko Oba road.

He had to take okada to his next stop. If you see Santa on Okada today, don't ask him where he's going. He's very pissed!! 

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